Friday, November 7, 2008


Still thinking about how I feel sometimes and now I'm wondering if this may be what I'm experiencing.

Stresses me:
-unfamiliar places
-sometimes traveling short distances
-out of my comfort zone
-fight or flight reaction

Most day I'm OK going to work and church but shopping, grocery shopping, church events other then Sunday morning, public events and the kids school events put me on edge.
I suffer from migraines and I'm beginning to wonder if they are connected to this. I hardly ever have them when I'm at home with no plans to go anywhere. I get them often during the work week and mostly at work. I constantly have my Theracane with me to help massage out the beginnings of a migraine so I can stay relaxed and not tense. I don't even have a stressful job, I like my co-workers very much and I like what I do so what is it that stresses me?

I don't recall any trauma as a child or adult that would cause me to fear going anywhere. We always had tons of family and friends around when I was growing up so it's not like I had a quiet upbringing. As a kid I tapped dance and had many performances, twirled the baton and had many competitions & parades. In high school I was on the flag team and loved the football games, competitions and parades.

Never liked going to clubs or parties. Those always represented danger and tension caused by alcohol and drugs. As a teenager and adult I've never been comfortable in social settings when it was just about socializing and chatting. I'm not good at small talk so I figured that was what made me uncomfortable. Well, I'm tired of thinking about it. Just going to deal with it one day at a time.

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